Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Vampires are from Venus, Werewolves are from Mars / Vera Nazarian

Reviewed by: ?wazithinkin

Genre: Parody / Humor / Paranormal

Approximate word count: 10-15,000 words

Kindle  US: YES  UK: YES  Nook: YES  Smashwords: NO  Paper: YES
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“Vera Nazarian immigrated to the USA from the former USSR as a kid, sold her first story at the age of 17, and since then has published numerous works in anthologies and magazines, and has seen her fiction translated into eight languages... Vera lives in Los Angeles and is working on a number of book-length projects... She uses her Armenian sense of humor and her Russian sense of suffering to bake conflicted pirozhki and make art. In addition to being a writer and award-winning artist, she is also the publisher of Norilana Books.”

To learn more about Ms. Nazarian and check out her other published books, please visit her website.


This novelette is a “Comprehensive Guide to Attracting Supernatural Love.”

“Admit it, you've secretly dreamed of dating a sexy brooding vampire or an alpha werewolf... But what about dating zombies, mummies, angels, fairies, demons, ghosts, random spotted aliens with tentacles, or other random metaphysical impossibilities? Furthermore, what if those paranormal beings in turn dreamed of dating each other -- each one in search of their own supernatural soul mates?

The answer lies, as usual, in the planets, and the entire solar system of planetary harmonic alignment. Take the supernatural compatibility test and discover your own soul planet. Discover what planet rules which supernatural species, and which paranormal personality combinations offer the most compatibility to each other -- and to you. And then, be matched with the supernatural soul mate of your wildest dreams! It's all in here!”


This is indeed a comprehensive study!  Ms. Navarian knows her topic well. This guide full of humor, it also contains practical self-help advice as an added bonus. As in “Do not, under any circumstances, leave a Venusian and a Martian in the same room unsupervised, unless you plan a remodel and want to save on demolition expenses.”

It includes all around sage advice:

Yes, it's a scary big universal dating pool. We all have to get along, so we are all naturally attracted to people with whom we must learn to get along. Because, at the end of the cosmic day (and just before cosmic happy hour), we kind of need them. And they need us. So that the world does not fall apart as a result of our infantile unresolved conflict.

There is also educational information included!

Venus is the second planet from the sun, boiling-hot and roiling with primeval gases, especially methane (think, auto exhaust and farts). Naturally, it is the planet of Love...

...the Moon is tiny in the greater scheme of planet things, but it's huge and devastating in our poetic imagination--deceptively cool and stately-slow, sailing in the night heavens--and it controls the tides. And Mercury is also tiny, scalding-hot on one side only (like your toast), and super-fast, and closest to the sun and far from us--and yet it has that damned Retrograde every few months that causes our mail to get lost, our pants to shrink in the dryer, and ruins our travel plans. How is that not sneaky and impressive?

All of this is just the tip of the iceberg. This book includes a test to help you determine which paranormal you are best suited for a love relationship with and follows it up with an analysis of your results. All in all this is an entertaining read. I really enjoyed the writing style utilized in this novelette.

Format/Typo Issues:

I found no significant editing or formatting errors.

Rating: **** Four stars


A Voracious Reader said...

This sounds exactly like my type of read. Must add it to the TBR. :)

?wazithinkin said...

It is a fun read. Thanks for stopping by and posting, Voracious Reader.

Unknown said...

I love the title. Excellent review, Linda.

?wazithinkin said...

Thanks Pete. :)